Hello, my name is Meg and I’m a complete freak. Yep, I’m crazy and the worst part is that I’m conflicted!!!!
All kidding aside, I do find myself wondering who the real me is. There are times when I am sweet, kind, loving and have a strong desire to do the right thing. At other times, I am hateful, cruel, wicked and mean. So which is it?
Recently, I read a devotional from Joe Gibbs where he said that as humans we are “inconsistent at best, self-destructive at worst.” I don’t know about you, but I found huge relief in this statement because it said that I was NOT ALONE in this struggle as person who claims Jesus Christ as her savior.
Since I care what God thinks about my heart, it saddens me that on some days I feel like a lover of the Lord and other days I slam the door in His face. Why? Why? Why? Where is the consistency? And why can’t I stick to the good side of the spectrum?
The beautiful part of this problem is that God knows ALL this and still loves me. In fact, He sent His son to earth because He knew I (and many others) would never measure up to perfection. Now that is a complete RELIEF!!!
Okay, since I am aware of God’s love and the sacrifice that was made on the cross I am not off the hook. It is my responsibility to make a conscious effort to change my behavior and live as God intended.
Like any parent, He knows what is best for me and how life would be in the palm of my hand if only I would allow Him to be my guide. It is by His grace that he allows me to choose my path, but forgives me when I realize I’m going down the wrong one.
Below are my top three practices that help enormously in resolving my inner turmoil. Beware…I have to do them daily and sometimes hourly for them to work!
THREE WAYS TO RESOLVE CHARACTER CONFLICT
- Pray – Sounds simple. It is. My worst days are when I don’t wake up and start the day with God. I have also found that asking for His desires and will for the day really helps me stay on track and keep the ‘bad’ thoughts and behaviors at bay.
- Read the Bible – Ok. This is not so simple. It takes discipline and courage to open the Bible every day. I encourage you to sign up for a daily devotional or a “read the bible in a year” email in order to make this happen. Just opening up the book is scary and very overwhelming. Also, making sure that you regard it as God’s love letter to YOU, instead of a book of rules because that kind of thinking keeps negativity or past perceptions from getting in the way.
- Forgive – A HUGE step! And oh, so NOT simple! I was in shock when I read the Lord’s Prayer and understood that it said “forgive MY trespasses as I forgive those who trespass against ME.” Uh oh. It is no secret that I keep a list of my husband’s comments and actions tucked in my back pocket ready to be used in any scenario that doesn’t fit my needs. I still struggle with this one. The world is full of mean people, hateful comments and down-right nasty stuff, but it is my job to forgive and move on. (To make this happen refer to No.1)
Do you struggle with wishy washy behavior, feelings or thoughts? I would love to hear what works for you!
Some Wisdom for Today: Proverbs 23:12 – Apply your heart to instruction and your ears to words of knowledge.