A Mustard Seed

Yesterday, I went to lunch with a dear friend of mine.  I left the restaurant pumped and ready to conquer the world.  In fact, I was ready to sign up for a completely different career path and jump into the sea of hard work, fun and making some serious dough!

I raced home to tell my husband I had made a decision to change directions and try something new.  I explained in great detail what my new career would entail and what the many benefits would be.

He patiently listened to my endless chatter all the while smiling with that knowing smirk.

Well, just eat a bug!!!

It didn’t take me long to realize that this was just another conversation in the slew of many that we’ve had about Meg’s exciting new future.  Meg’s big plans.  Meg’s big dreams.  Meg’s big mouth….

Toby Keith’s country song, A Little Less Talk and a Lot More Action, comes to mind when I think about the numerous times I’ve come home with a ‘great idea’!

  • In all toil there is profit, but mere talk tends only to poverty. Proverbs 14:23

Of course, as we continued to discuss the pros and cons of making this particular career change, I noticed that my great plans and ideas were systematically and logically murdered.  Yes, murdered, dissected and destroyed.

By the end of our talk, I was deflated, discouraged and upset that my husband makes so much dang sense.  Grrrr.

That’s why I love him so much.  He reels me back when I’m about to jump off the cliff without a parachute.

What I realized after much contemplation (and a whole lot of feeling sorry for myself) was that my friend is living her dream and being wonderfully successful.  Her hard work, persistence and patience have opened up the floodgates of heaven and she is most certainly being rewarded.   She is oozing joy and confidence that she is doing what God created her to do.  And I am tremendously proud of her and completely happy for her.

The truth is that I’m a little jealous because I want to ooze joy and confidence, too.  I want to FEEL successful, get kudos and bring home some bacon (right now I cook the bacon, but don’t bring any in…well, sometimes I cook).

Unfortunately, I stay in this state of dissatisfaction and discontentment A LOT.

Because of my lack of self worth I dive into different directions hoping that something will stick.  Basically, I lean towards a selfish and worldly view of “what Meg wants to be when she grows up” instead of relying on God to fulfill my needs, guide my steps and be my everything.

The down and dirty truth is that the path I am currently traveling is not taking me where I want to go quick enough.  Especially, when I compare myself to others.  Plus, I’m letting the world’s idea of success be the center of my focus instead of allowing God to use me regardless of whether it’s in a large or small way.

What I fail to realize on a regular basis is that what I’m doing today by loving my husband, raising my children, sharing my faith and writing my blog may be small in comparison to the world’s successful measuring stick of a famous author whose books are made into movies (a girl can dream – although, said girl should actually write a book if she wants it published, much less made into a movie), but I’m walking down God’s road.

My worth is nothing if I’m basing it on the amount of money I make, but that doesn’t mean I’m not worth something to God.  He uses us where we are and better yet, HE LOVES US REGARDLESS OF WHERE WE ARE.

  • He put another parable before them, saying, “The kingdom of heaven is like a grain of mustard seed that a man took and sowed in his field. It is the smallest of all seeds, but when it has grown it is larger than all the garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds of the air come and make nests in its branches.” Matthew 13:31-32

God uses our weaknesses to show His glory!  How awesome is that?!?!?!?

I do dream of actually making money by writing for Christ and fulfilling my need to meet people and chatter incessantly!  OH, I would LOVE that!

However, today, God has me where I am.  And hopefully, I am learning, gaining wisdom and using this time wisely to prepare myself for the future, whatever it may hold.

Rest assured that God has a job for each of us.  None are the same and they are all worthwhile in His eyes. God will use us for His own will…we just have to get out of the way long enough for Him to do His thing!

The first step is to stop comparing ourselves to others.  Then…be patient.

Some Wisdom for Today: Proverbs 12:24 – The hand of the diligent will rule, while the slothful will be put to forced labor.  

2 Responses

  1. There is nothing on this Earth worth as much as you are. You are a Child of God.

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